The lessons I learned from traveling and living abroad. Part 2

Photo by Val Vesa on Unsplash

If you have not read my first blog post on this topic, you can do it right here. Now, let's jump into the second part.

Traveling and living in different countries are life-changing experiences. They transform us into better versions of ourselves. We start thinking in a different way and seeing the world from a whole new perspective. The people we meet, the challenges we go through, the adventures we live leave memories that we will remember forever. They make us grow and become better people and citizens. Seeing how other people live, what their life philosophy is, how they overcome challenges are things that show us how different and colorful the world is.

People often see only the good and fun side of traveling and living in different countries, but it is also true that often we can face many difficulties while being away from home. We can feel lonely, misunderstood, like we are not at our place, we will miss our families and friends, we will want to speak our mother language because we don't find the right words to express what we feel and so on. It is not always fun being away, but for sure, these are experiences that make us learn a lot about ourselves and the world, become more conscious about the lifestyle we have and the relationships we maintain, be more aware of what really matters in life.

Here I share with you some more lessons that I learned from my experience with traveling and living abroad. Some of them are more practical, others are more personal, all of them were life-changing for me.

You will improve your history knowledge.

Even if you don't like history, you will definitely learn something during your travels. You don't have to go to museums to enrich your general knowledge about the history of the town you visit or you live in. Just looking at the buildings, the monuments on the streets, the food people eat (check my previous article) and you can learn so much. Hanging out with locals is very helpful as well. They will tell you a lot about their country and city. They can definitely be your free history teachers.

This is such a funnier and more pleasant way to learn something new. I also love going to museums, but I know that I learn faster when I explore the city by myself or with locals, when I talk to people who tell me historical facts using theirs own simple words. I remember much more information this way instead of reading it in a book or visiting a museum. So, just walking down the street and paying attention to what you see and you learn so much about the town and the country. Isn't it fascinating ? Knowledge is literally everywhere !

You will see that your country is not « the most beautiful one ».

I don't really like statements like this: « my country is the most beautiful one », « I will never see a place so beautiful as my home town », « the view from my home balcony is the most gorgeous one »... Well, objectively, this is false. You will definitely see places more beautiful than your hometown and country. The world is so big and there are so many great places that we can not even imagine. For many years I was listening that I will never see mountains and beaches more beautiful than those in my country... and well, I actually did !

However, what makes your hometown and country « the most beautiful » for you, is your emotional attachment to them. The memories from your childhood, the great moments you spent with your friends and family, the love and the joy that you felt at a particular moment in your life. This is what makes a place « the most beautiful » ! I still remember when I was a child how I was waking up and seeing the sun light crossing the curtains in the morning. I loved staring at it. It was so beautiful, so peaceful, so calming. I was hearing my parents talking in the kitchen and seeing my sister still asleep on the other side of the room. This is love. This is beauty. This peace. This is something that you can not replace and this is why many people say that your home is the most beautiful place in the world.

You will see the positive sides of your own culture.

Another very popular cliché is when people are constantly criticizing their own culture thinking that every other one is a better one. Growing up in a small European country I have been listening how people in other countries live better, how the life is better somewhere else, how people are better, how everything is just... better. Funny enough, when I moved to France I noticed that French were saying the same things about their country. They are always complaining about how bad their country has become lately, how people are so rude, how the government is awful... People always think that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.

The thing is that while I am traveling and living abroad, I notice that actually my own Bulgarian culture is not so bad as Bulgarian people think it is. We don't live so badly, we eat a lot of real whole food from people's gardens, we work hard and I think that people in general are really generous and open comparing to other cultures. We are much more spontaneous and honest (some people could find us even a little bit rude) than French people are, for example. French have theirs own cultural qualities as well – they really appreciate the beauty in everything, they will always prefer quality over quantity, they don't hurry and always fight for theirs rights.

So, when you start traveling and meeting people from different countries, you will definitely realize that actually there are so many good and positive things about your culture that you have always been taking for granted, but now you see that not every people has them. Try to appreciate more your culture.

There is no better or worse culture.

It is impossible to compare cultures. However, people always try to compare countries by their size, the number of the citizens, how rich and powerful the country is etc. As we can still kind of make such a comparing using some crazy numbers, it is ridiculous to compare cultures. Culture is history, traditions, lifestyle, life philosophy and these are all things that can not be compared. They are not good or bad. They are treasures for the world and the humanity.

However, there are maybe a few very popular cultures like the French, the English, the Indian, the American ones... that people really “like”and are “into”. Of course, these are some very rich and interesting to know cultures, but I think that every one is. Then we also have the Muslim one that gained some really bad reputation these last years and you can unfortunately definitely feel that in countries where there are many Muslim immigrants. Also, as I am originally from Bulgaria, I can say that for many people this is not really the most interesting destination in the world and they will not be very curious about our culture. However, I also know people who went to Bulgaria without knowing anything about it and just fell in love with it.

There is really no better or worse culture. The media tries to make us believe that some countries are dangerous, that some people with certain nationalities are “bad people” or girls “are prostitutes” or Romanians are poor and live on the streets because these are the Romanians who you will see in Western countries who are probably not even Romanians, that people in some countries are unhappy and miserable when they are actually not... You can always learn something new while traveling abroad and every culture has something to give you and to teach you about life.

People have the same social and political issues everywhere, but on a different level.

I grew up in a relatively poor country and I have been listening my whole life how everything related to our political and social state is bad and wrong, how people in the government are corrupted, how nobody thinks about the poor, the people with health issues, the people on the street, the retired old people, the children who don't go to school... the list is endless. When I moved to France and then to the Netherlands, I noticed that the people there were complaining about the same things – again the poor, the old, the healthcare, the bad education system and so on. When I am just traveling, I can not really say immediately what a country political and social problems are because I don't live there, but hanging out with locals makes me understand a little more about theirs issues and what I have noticed is that they are again the same!

People everywhere have the same political and social problems, but on a different level. We all struggle with education and healthcare transformation programs, with fighting against poverty and allowing old people to have a decent life after retiring. It is true that some countries are richer and more powerful than others and it might seem that they don't have this issues, but they do. Extremely poor people, for example, live also in France, in the UK, in the USA... not only in Africa. We need to stop thinking that what is wrong in our country will be right somewhere else. People try different formulas and for some of them they work pretty well and for others not. There is not a perfect place in the world. Every country has its own problems and try to deal with them.

You will definitely pick some things from the new culture.

After so many years of living abroad I can definitely say that I picked some things from the French culture and incorporate them in my own one. This could be some stupid things like eating cheese and chocolate cakes with a lot of butter (my guilty pleasures), drinking wine, listening to some old french songs and watching french movies, but also some personal character traits.

French people are almost never in a hurry. They can wait at a restaurant or at the supermarket forever and will not be disturbed by that. Then, they will take their whole time to do what they have to do, even if 10 people are waiting in a line behind them. At first, I was always getting angry because of their slowness, but with time you get used to it and you even start doing the same thing. Also, French will be always ready to fight for theirs rights (this is why they always go on strikes) something that I was afraid to do for a long time, just because in my culture we don't really do that (which is by the way very sad). French will shout at the phone to some service guy or at an institution just to have their things done. They will fight until they get what they want. If you want to live in France, this is the only way you can survive the bad administration system. Fight!

So, picking some things from the culture of the country you live in is inevitable. You see how people live and how things work and you just somehow start unconsciously doing the same. This is a part of the process of growing and expanding your vision of the world. You will hate some things about the new culture and others, you will find great and incorporate in your own life.

All this makes you a “rich” person.

All the people you meet, all the challenges you go through, all the new things you discover, all the new experiences make you a rich person. You have this incredible opportunity to enrich your knowledge about the world and about yourself. You see the bigger picture, the diversity of people, cultures, languages, traditions, beliefs, life philosophies, food... How it is all so different and it is all so related at the same time. How we can be from a whole different parts of the world and yet we can still click and create great relationships. All these amazing experiences away from home leave so many memories. They will not be all happy and positive, but you will learn something from all of them for sure. This is why people say that the best way to spend your money is to invest it in traveling and seeing the world. This is an investment in your personal growth. You become a “richer” human being, a person who has stories to tell, memories to remember, pictures to show, people to call and maybe even many “homes” to go to.

All people in the world want to be happy, but happiness is different for everybody.

People all over the world want one thing no matter their culture, their religion, their lifestyle – they all want to be happy. Happiness is what everyone is looking for. The thing is that happiness is different for everybody and for every culture. In some countries being happy means having a calm and peaceful life away from traffic jams and pollution. For others, this is getting the dream job, becoming a millionaire, buying a big house, starting a family. We all have different perceptions and understandings about happiness. They all are mostly based on our culture and the mentality of the people who surround us. So, happiness is very relative for everybody. You don't have to accept what others think happiness is, but knowing that its definition is not universal makes you become more tolerant and empathetic.

However, I think that there is one thing that is universal and this is love. We don't need a language to express love. Love is in the eyes, in the smile, in the voice, on people's face... all over them. You can not mistake it!

Sometimes you will feel lost.

This is an inevitable step. Living abroad for so many years makes me ask myself more and more often questions like : Who am I? What is my culture? Do I feel at my place when I go back to my hometown? Can I go back living in my country of origin? These are maybe questions without answers, but we all have them at some point or another. Living in different countries, traveling the world, meeting new people all the time makes you realize that the question of “cultural identity” is very complex. If we never go out of our country or we do it only for holidays now and then, we can maybe talk easier about cultural identity, but when you are all the time on the road – at some point you stop knowing who you really are and where your home is. You can feel a bit lost. Having knowledge about the world and people is not an easy thing. The more you know, the more you realize that you don't know anything. The more answers you find, the more questions you have. We will never know everything.

This is a great journey to self-discovery. Sometimes you need to feel lost in order to find yourself back. Our whole life we try to understand who we are and what we want in life. Maybe one day we will find the answers.

Be authentic and do not forget where you come from.

As I already said, after living away from home for so many years, it could be very difficult at some point to tell who you really are. However, I have seen so many foreigners living abroad or traveling who try to be someone else only to fit in in the new country. They will try to talk like the locals, the think that their accent is something bad because it makes them different, they will start randomly acting like they are whole new people... I find this pretty odd. I understand that we all want to find our tribe and to feel at our place, but the only way we can actually feel happy in life and find the best friends and create the best relationships is by being authentic. Be true to yourself. What makes you unique and special is this amazing mixture of cultures and knowledge that you carry within your heart and mind. Continue learning and becoming a better version of yourself, but do not forget who you really are and where you came from. I know that I don't come from the most popular country in the world (people still ask me where Bulgaria is), but I know that I grew up there, my family lives there, I had incredible memories with friends and relatives, I took my first steps into growing up as an individual in this country and even if I travel and live in another one until my last days, somehow deep inside, in my core I will always be Bulgarian.

So, appreciate your own culture and do not forget that you will always be related to it, no matter where you go and how many people you meet. Do not forget where you come from!

What does "authentic" mean?

True friendship / love knows no boundaries.

When you meet new people all the time and you already know that everything in life is temporary, it could be quite scary when you find a person with whom you make a great match. You start thinking that once you leave the country or they do, your relationship will die. You say to each other that you are going to text and skype at least once per month or more and then you see that in the beginning is probably like that and 1 year later you don't even remember this person. Sometimes, very often, maybe even most of the times, this is what it happens. We get so caught up in our life and our work that it is very possible to not feel the courage to maintain a long distance relationship. However, you have to know that when people want to stay in touch, they just do it! They make the effort. I have friends who live all over the world. Some of them I saw for the last time 3 or even more years ago but yet, we are still in touch. We are not texting every single day, but sometimes we skype, sometimes we exchange what is happening in our lives and sometimes we even visit each other.

You don't need to text one person every day to know that you care for each other. I know that if a person with whom I had a great relationship wants to pay me a visit, I will be happy to see him/her again even if the last time we spoke was years ago. I believe it is the same for them. When people want to meet again and be together, they make it happen. As I said, the only universal thing in the world is love – you can feel it and this is something that does not fade away with time or distance.

The world is a place of endless possibilities.

This world is so big and gives us so many great opportunities wherever we are. They look for us everywhere. We just have to pay attention. Sometimes we feel lost and discourage, we think that the world is going against us and then, we realize that this is a blessing in disguise. It always is! Traveling, living in different places, discovering new cultures make you dream bigger, make you see that after all everything is going to be fine. No matter what is happening now, you are going to be fine. Everything really happens for a reason. Maybe you will not understand it immediately, but you will with time. So, stay true to yourself. Explore this big world. Cherish every single moment of this life. Appreciate what you have now and think less about what you don't have,=. Know that you are exactly where you have to be and that you have all you need, no more or less, just enough! Stay positive. Challenges come and go like everything else in life. People will disappoint you, but they will also make you the happiest person in the world. Love yourself, love who you are, do what makes your heart sings. Do not waste your time. Start. Now. Love, Elena

You can also check :

How to travel on a budget and why this will completely change your life

Why is solo traveling your path to self-discovery?